[It should be impossible, he thinks in a vague sort of way that doesn't really cohesively come together as actual words so much as a feeling. It should be impossible the way the two of them respond to each other. One gives and the other takes, but in a seamless sequence of events, those roles are fluid between the two of them. As Joseph looks for every spot that pulls a gasp or a soft murmur from Caesar, Caesar pulls him closer with a tight grip and makes it seem like the world might fall apart around them, but Joseph will still be right here close to him.]
[It's perfect. Or as close to perfect as either one of them can be in this precise moment, and maybe that's all that matters to make it actually perfect to Joseph. Normally, he might be irritated at the way Caesar is messing with his hair because he likes soft touches to his hair, but he likes it that Caesar's a little rougher than that. Caesar's never really treated Joseph like he was delicate. Sure, he's held the attitude that Joseph was inexperienced and immature, but he wasn't wrong then. (Maybe he's not even wrong to think that now regardless of the known outcome of the fight that's waiting for Joseph back home.) But those things are not the same was treating Joseph like he's fragile, like he can't handle it. Joseph doubts his own strength sometimes. It's natural that he does, and he's pretty sure that if he didn't, he'd be blindsided too quickly to be able to recover in time and come out on top in a fight. But Caesar never really seems to doubt him, not about anything anymore, but especially not about what he's capable of. Sometimes that feels like a big responsibility and sometimes it's like this where it feels natural and good.]
[One of Joseph's hands slips down past Caesar's neck to his collarbone, fingers tracing over the hard lines of muscle of his chest and his stomach over the top of his shirt. Caesar's strong, too, he thinks and he wonders if he's ever really realized that about himself before. It's different in the ways that Joseph's strong because Joseph's never had anyone depend on him, but it's still important. It's so important, and he murmurs wordlessly against Caesar's skin to tell him as much.]
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[It's perfect. Or as close to perfect as either one of them can be in this precise moment, and maybe that's all that matters to make it actually perfect to Joseph. Normally, he might be irritated at the way Caesar is messing with his hair because he likes soft touches to his hair, but he likes it that Caesar's a little rougher than that. Caesar's never really treated Joseph like he was delicate. Sure, he's held the attitude that Joseph was inexperienced and immature, but he wasn't wrong then. (Maybe he's not even wrong to think that now regardless of the known outcome of the fight that's waiting for Joseph back home.) But those things are not the same was treating Joseph like he's fragile, like he can't handle it. Joseph doubts his own strength sometimes. It's natural that he does, and he's pretty sure that if he didn't, he'd be blindsided too quickly to be able to recover in time and come out on top in a fight. But Caesar never really seems to doubt him, not about anything anymore, but especially not about what he's capable of. Sometimes that feels like a big responsibility and sometimes it's like this where it feels natural and good.]
[One of Joseph's hands slips down past Caesar's neck to his collarbone, fingers tracing over the hard lines of muscle of his chest and his stomach over the top of his shirt. Caesar's strong, too, he thinks and he wonders if he's ever really realized that about himself before. It's different in the ways that Joseph's strong because Joseph's never had anyone depend on him, but it's still important. It's so important, and he murmurs wordlessly against Caesar's skin to tell him as much.]