[It feels like he can't breathe. Even in those moments when he remembers how, all he can smell is Joseph, like he's the only thing in the world. His heart is beating in his ears and he thinks it might beat so hard it explodes. He knew he wanted more and that's why he did what he did, but he doesn't know how to cope with this, with someone else doing this to him, with how it's left him speechless and trembling, leaning on someone else for safety.]
[He never does that. He never, ever, ever trusts someone else this much. But Joseph drags his nails down again and he can feel himself shaking, helpless sounds slipping out of his throat like he's a girl or something. If Joseph stops touching him he might die. Or cry. He doesn't want it to stop. He feels stretched out thin like the tensest wire, and safer than he's ever been in his life.]
[(Is that love? Is it? Is love just safety and sex? He doesn't know. He can't think.)]
Jojo, [he manages,] Jojo, [and then he's remembered and lifted his head and he's kissing Joseph before he realizes he wants to, kissing him and pushing against him and tangling fingers in his hair because if this stops he will, without question, forget how to breathe.]
no subject
[He never does that. He never, ever, ever trusts someone else this much. But Joseph drags his nails down again and he can feel himself shaking, helpless sounds slipping out of his throat like he's a girl or something. If Joseph stops touching him he might die. Or cry. He doesn't want it to stop. He feels stretched out thin like the tensest wire, and safer than he's ever been in his life.]
[(Is that love? Is it? Is love just safety and sex? He doesn't know. He can't think.)]
Jojo, [he manages,] Jojo, [and then he's remembered and lifted his head and he's kissing Joseph before he realizes he wants to, kissing him and pushing against him and tangling fingers in his hair because if this stops he will, without question, forget how to breathe.]