[Distantly, Joseph thinks that he shouldn't be that sensitive. Whether it's touches, kisses, or bites, it shouldn't stir any strong reaction out of him because they are simple things. Simple things that become greater than their sum because it's Caesar who bites at his hipbone and kisses his thigh. It's Caesar's voice that vibrates against his skin and— Joseph has to bite his lip, but it's not to keep himself quiet. Honestly, he doesn't think he could even with a sincere effort because nearly every little touch from Caesar's mouth is enough to wordless pleas from Joseph.]
[It's that he wants to watch. He wants to, but he doesn't know if he can. For starters, it's not like he's ever done anything like this before, and as much as he'd never want to admit it, he still feels a giddy sort of nervousness resting right in the bottom of his chest. Which is strange because it's not coming coupled with hardly any worried thoughts rising to the front of his consciousness. He trust Caesar. He trusts Caesar with his life, with his everything. He loves Caesar. If any single one of those things weren't true, this wouldn't be happening either because Joseph or Caesar wouldn't allow it to happen. So, it's the energy of the nervousness that's trying to settle more than anything, and as Caesar's kissing along his cock, Joseph's fighting every urge to squirm and fidget. His breathing's all gone to hell, but he could care less because he remains relatively still and that's what's important.]
[But oh, he can't watch. Even biting his lip to give him something else to focus on, Caesar's lips on him override any other sensation, and Joseph has to look up at the ceiling just for a few seconds as he sucks in a breath and simply forgets that he's supposed to breath out. Next time, he thinks. Greedily. He realizes that's a greedy and terribly selfish thing to think that there will be a next time when he hasn't had an answer beyond I want you. Which isn't a bad answer. It's given Joseph hope, and he's allowed himself to believe there's a chance that even if it doesn't really mean I love you, I'm just not sure, it might someday mean I love you. He lets the breath go and it's a jagged, rough thing, but it's gone and he remembers to breathe in again somewhere in there, and it's then that he manages to work up the nerve to look again.]
no subject
[It's that he wants to watch. He wants to, but he doesn't know if he can. For starters, it's not like he's ever done anything like this before, and as much as he'd never want to admit it, he still feels a giddy sort of nervousness resting right in the bottom of his chest. Which is strange because it's not coming coupled with hardly any worried thoughts rising to the front of his consciousness. He trust Caesar. He trusts Caesar with his life, with his everything. He loves Caesar. If any single one of those things weren't true, this wouldn't be happening either because Joseph or Caesar wouldn't allow it to happen. So, it's the energy of the nervousness that's trying to settle more than anything, and as Caesar's kissing along his cock, Joseph's fighting every urge to squirm and fidget. His breathing's all gone to hell, but he could care less because he remains relatively still and that's what's important.]
[But oh, he can't watch. Even biting his lip to give him something else to focus on, Caesar's lips on him override any other sensation, and Joseph has to look up at the ceiling just for a few seconds as he sucks in a breath and simply forgets that he's supposed to breath out. Next time, he thinks. Greedily. He realizes that's a greedy and terribly selfish thing to think that there will be a next time when he hasn't had an answer beyond I want you. Which isn't a bad answer. It's given Joseph hope, and he's allowed himself to believe there's a chance that even if it doesn't really mean I love you, I'm just not sure, it might someday mean I love you. He lets the breath go and it's a jagged, rough thing, but it's gone and he remembers to breathe in again somewhere in there, and it's then that he manages to work up the nerve to look again.]